Sometimes the unexpected happens. And it's important for doulas and birth keepers to know how to support the families we serve in a mindful, meaningful and non-intrusive way when this occurs. But how exactly can we do it, and do it well?

In this blog, I'll share 5 ways that doulas can proactively guide clients during pregnancy to be prepared for and embrace whatever comes their way.

#1 Open Communication

Open communication is a cornerstone of the support doulas provide to families. By fostering an environment where clients feel safe to express their fears, hopes, and preferences, doulas can build a trusting relationship that enhances the birthing experience.

When communicating with clients, doulas should actively listen, ask open-ended questions, and provide clear, unbiased information about various aspects of pregnancy, birth, and postpartum care. When pregnant couples feel heard and understood, they are more likely to communicate their needs and concerns, allowing doulas to offer personalized care and advocacy.

It's important to establish open and honest communication with mothers about their birth preferences and potential deviations from their ideal birth plan. Instead of idealizing and romanticizing birth, I feel that doulas should be upfront and realistic about the nature of birth. Birth is wild, unpredictable, and cannot be fully controlled.

Doulas can help clients to take ownership of their experience, full responsibility of the choices they make, and map out both their ideal birthing preferences as well as a backup emergency transfer plan they feel comfortable with. Help them to realize X, Y, and Z are possible and encourage them to take an attitude of acceptance of all potential birth outcomes, while they plan and pray for the best.

Open communication becomes particularly crucial when unexpected birth outcomes occur. During such times, emotions can run high, and having a doula who maintains clear, compassionate communication and a grounded, reassuring presence can make a significant difference. By keeping clients informed about what is happening and why, birth keepers help to demystify the medical processes and decisions being made. This transparency can alleviate some of the anxiety and fear associated with unforeseen complications.

Doulas and birthkeepers alike can support couples in processing their emotions and adjusting their expectations, offering reassurance and empathy. This level of open, honest communication ensures that clients feel supported and empowered, even in the face of unexpected challenges, helping them to navigate their birth experience with resilience and confidence.

#2 Educational Preparation

Doulas play a critical role in preparing families for the childbirth journey, including the possibility of unforeseen circumstances or unexpected birth outcomes. One of the most effective ways we can inform our clients is by providing thorough childbirth education throughout the pregnancy. 

Holistic childbirth education should cover the spectrum of birth scenarios, from typical labor and delivery processes to potential variations and complications. By discussing these topics openly, doulas help clients develop a comprehensive understanding of what to expect, making them better equipped to handle any situation that might arise. This preparation includes informing clients about medical interventions, pain management options, the physiological process of birth and the different stages of labor, ensuring they have a well-rounded view of the birth process.

"By setting realistic expectations and preparing clients for the unexpected, doulas help reduce anxiety and build confidence."

In addition to general childbirth education, doulas can help families create flexible birth plans that account for various possibilities. This involves discussing the parents' preferences and priorities while also emphasizing the importance of adaptability. Birthkeepers get to guide couples through the creation of a birth plan that outlines their ideal scenarios but also includes contingency plans for less favorable outcomes.

In my 10+ years as a wedding planner, I learned the unpredictability of the weather and the importance of creating a great rain plan before the big day, to be sure couples would be happy rain or shine. The same goes for birth. Rather than avoiding the big scary thing, what if we addressed it directly, talked about it, normalized it, and lined up great providers and backup plans we are comfortable with in the event of a hospital transfer, for instance?

By setting realistic expectations and preparing clients for the unexpected, doulas help reduce anxiety and build confidence. We can also provide resources and strategies for coping with unexpected changes, such as relaxation techniques, communication tips for interacting with medical staff, and ways to advocate for their needs.

The best doulas facilitate discussions about emotional and mental preparedness, encouraging clients to consider how they might feel and respond if things don't go as planned. This proactive approach allows families to mentally and emotionally prepare for various outcomes, fostering resilience and a sense of empowerment.

By educating and preparing our clients ahead of time, we ensure that families enter the birthing process with a strong foundation of knowledge and a flexible, informed mindset. This preparation not only supports the practical aspects of childbirth but also enhances the emotional well-being of the parents, helping them navigate the birth experience with greater confidence and peace of mind.

#3 Birth Scenario Role Playing

During birth, scenario planning and role playing is a crucial tool that some doulas use to help clients prepare for various potential outcomes. By discussing different scenarios ahead of time, birthkeepers like doulas may equip clients with the knowledge and strategies needed to navigate a range of situations with confidence. 

Consider covering common scenarios such as natural labor progression, the potential of medical interventions, and unexpected complications. By exploring these possibilities, birth keepers can help clients understand the spectrum of what might happen, reducing fear of the unknown and promoting a sense of preparedness.

Emphasizing flexibility and adaptability is key to effective scenario planning. Guide couples in visualizing how they might respond to different situations, ensuring they are mentally and emotionally ready to handle changes. Even practicing movements for untying a cord wrapped around a baby's neck, or practicing catching the baby from various birthing positions can help mothers and fathers prepare for home birth.

By understanding these scenarios in advance, clients can make informed decisions in the moment and feel more in control. Doulas can also role-play different communication strategies, helping clients practice how to express their needs and preferences to care providers, thus ensuring their voices are heard even in high-stress situations.

We doulas can provide ongoing support and reassurance throughout the birth, reminding our beloved clients of the scenarios they’ve discussed and the plans they’ve made. This continuity of care helps to maintain a calm and positive atmosphere, even if the birth takes unexpected turns. By reinforcing the idea that flexibility is a strength, doulas encourage clients to stay open to different outcomes and to trust their ability to adapt. This proactive approach not only prepares clients for a wide range of possibilities but also empowers them to approach their birthing experience with resilience and confidence, knowing they are supported no matter what arises.

#4 Emergency Protocols

Effective home birth doulas understand the importance of being well-versed in emergency protocols and hospital procedures. This knowledge enables us to provide accurate information to our clients and ensure preparedness in case of an unexpected hospital transfer.

Whether a doula serves hospital births outright or only in the case of hospital transfers, high quality doulas familiarize themselves with the policies and practices of local hospitals in their area, including how to facilitate a smooth transfer from a home birth setting to a hospital.

This preparation includes understanding the necessary paperwork, the quickest routes to the hospital, and the steps involved in coordinating with emergency medical services. By having this information handy, they can efficiently guide families through the process, minimizing stress and confusion during critical moments.

Knowing the hospital's protocols will also allow birth workers to set realistic expectations. Explain what typically happens during a transfer, from the initial call for help to arriving at the hospital and the potential interventions that may arise. This transparency helps clients mentally and emotionally prepare for the possibility of a transfer, reducing fear and uncertainty.

Advise parents on what to pack in a hospital bag, just in case, and how to advocate for their birth preferences even within a medical setting. This preparedness ensures that clients feel more in control and supported, even if their birth plan changes unexpectedly.

In addition to logistical support, knowledgeable doulas play a crucial role in emotional and psychological preparation. Reassure parents that a transfer to the hospital, while not part of the original plan, can still result in a positive and healthy outcome for both mother and baby.

By discussing potential scenarios and responses ahead of time, doulas help to foster a mindset of flexibility and resilience. This preparation allows mothers to approach their birth experience with confidence, knowing that they are ready to adapt to whatever circumstances arise, and that their doula is equipped to support them through every step of the journey.

#5 Emotional Check-Ins

Regular emotional check-ins are a vital aspect of the support that we can provide to our clients as doulas. By routinely engaging in open and empathetic conversations, care providers can help expectant parents address any fears or concerns they may have before the birth. This proactive approach ensures that emotional well-being is prioritized throughout the pregnancy journey.

"Understanding and addressing specific fears ahead of time allows doulas to tailor support strategies, ensuring the most effective assistance during labor."

During these check-ins, encourage moms and dads to express their anxieties, whether they stem from past experiences, concerns about pain management, or uncertainties about the birthing process. By creating a safe space for these discussions, it may alleviate fears and provide reassurance, fostering a sense of calm and confidence.

Addressing emotional concerns before the birth can significantly enhance the overall birth experience, even in the face of unexpected outcomes. When clients feel heard and supported, they are more likely to approach labor with a positive and empowered mindset. This mental and emotional preparedness can make a considerable difference in how they cope with the challenges and unpredictability of childbirth.

Understanding and addressing specific fears ahead of time allows childbirth care providers to tailor support strategies, providing the most effective assistance during labor. This personalized support helps clients feel more in control and resilient, which can contribute to a smoother and more positive birthing experience.

Additionally, regular emotional check-ins can play a crucial role in identifying and mitigating potential stressors that might impact the birth. By maintaining ongoing communication, doulas can monitor changes in clients' emotional states and offer timely interventions, such as relaxation techniques, coping strategies, and positive affirmations.

This consistent emotional support not only strengthens the client-doula relationship but also empowers clients to navigate their birthing journey with greater ease and confidence. Ultimately, by prioritizing emotional well-being and addressing concerns proactively, we doulas can enhance our clients' chances of experiencing a positive and fulfilling birth, regardless of the circumstances that may arise.

Remember, each birth experience is unique, and the role of a doula is to provide unwavering support, adapt to changing circumstances, and empower clients through every step of their journey.